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                                Relativism 3 -
                              People and Magic

         

                             By Jared P. DuBois

          

                   (c) Copyright 1987-94  By Jared DuBois


			     Chapter  -  Title

		 1     Physicality
		 2     Eternal Life
		 3     The Consciousness Specific Perspective
		 4     The Concept of Fate
		 5     Seeing Beyond Abstractions
		 6     Guiding Spirits
		 7     The Life Story Perspective
		 8     The Other Self
		 9     Magic
		10     Persuasion
		11     The Variance Factor
		12     The Ultimate Frontier
		       Postscript


Chapter 1  ---  Physicality

			       In The Game

		  We cannot judge a sport
		    while we are playing the game 
		   While we are in the picture
		     we cannot see its frame

		  All that there is in this world,
		    all of the pleasure and all the pain,
		   it seems all too confusing
		     to be understood by my little brain

		  Some people seek knowledge,
		    others seek wealth and fame
		   Some are wise,  some are not
		     some are strong,  some are lame

		  Those who have little usually lose,
		    those who have much usually gain
		   Some are in want of jewels and furs,
		     others are in need of water and grain

		  All have different wishes and hopes
		    yet living is their common aim
		   Each one fighting against time,
		     all different yet all the same

      There are very few things which all can agree upon.  Different
interpretations of events and philosophies and the possibly infinite
multitudes of variability in the thought processes of physical beings
leaves little chance of universal agreement upon anything.  Despite this,
 there is a completely universal concept  --  the universe.  Beings
within it at one time or another acknowledge their presence within the
confines of what we call the physical universe,  that place of blazing
fireballs in an ocean of nothingness.
      The degree to which people accept the facts of this experience or
their various interpretations for such phenomena has no significance to
the intangibility of this mode of existence.  The parameters are preset
and the number of possible outcomes indelibly fixed.  I do not wish one
to believe that ones existence in the physical world to be confining
although it is difficult not to see it so.  One body,  one lifetime,  one
chance to make a dent in a vast stream of existences does seem to be a
rather strict set of rules by which to abide.  Of course,  few readily
accept such limitations.  Many believe in extended existences beyond
bodily termination and any sort of belief in magic,  miracles,  or
mythology is to entertain the notion that we or other beings can defy the
limitations of our possibly temporal existences and limited capacities.
      It is to the world of our waking,  the normal level of awareness
selves which I which to address first and separately from any other less
widely accepted and more abstractly founded notions of life.  Since it is
the physical world which provides the inputs for any larger more
harmonious or more just notions of order for living things,  the
information that this sole base source provides is fundamental if not
intrinsic to understanding interpretive drives of conceptually based
environmental landscapes.  What the physical world is should be
considered in conjunction what it compels those who perceive it to do and
the mental framework they construct as to the various ways of
interpreting it.
      Our minds adapt,  or more accurately are manufactured to be
shaped by our physical environmental worlds as much as our bodies are. 
What concepts we are exposed to and what existences we encounter come to
us through our senses,  our links to the physical world.  Even our
organization for abstract thoughts can sometimes take the form of
physical storage systems.  Those who believe purely in a physical form of
existence think that those similarities of concepts to physical things
might stem from the argument that the physical world creates
consciousness.  It is through the interaction of material chemical
substances in the physical brains of species which cause thoughts and
consciousness,  they would say.  That our minds should so greatly be
shaped by a physical existence and the fact that we tend to think of
ideas as 'things' are just logical deductions from fact based experience.
 I do not wish to argue this case as my preference has been undoubtedly
given away and a perceived bias would taint any attempts at fairness.  I
will do my best however,  to state the facts which the physical world
portends and leave it up to the reader whether or not to believe or
disbelieve them.
      Humanity and other species are masses of protoplasm which exist
and function to reproduce themselves.  This is a process which can
continue over a time span covering many generations.  Certain
observations about the species' environment can be communicated from one
generation to another thereby enabling descendants to avoid hazardous
situations and objects.  These species undergo constant subtle mutations
while interacting with their environments which enable them to better
conform with a changing world.  These mutations occurring prior to the
births of offspring are passed along to the offspring,  and over long
periods of time these changes can lead to the creations of seemingly new
species of similar genetically based forms.  Different species vie for
dominance over potential rivals for resources under any given
environmental conditions.  When a species overpopulates a region it risks
depleting its food sources and greatly lessens its chances for survival. 
When this happens or when a species perceives no great threat from other
species,  it can turn upon itself sensing others of its kind as potential
rivals for limited food resources.
      Beings within a species go through stages which constitute a
series of experiences which are in sum called a 'life'.  These stages are
contained within the concept of aging and has three distinct phases.  The
growth stage goes from conception to a period in time shortly after
sexual maturation.  During this time many species' young require the
assistance of others within their particular species to protect them
until they are able to withstand the dangers in their environment on
their own.  The reproductive phase is often the longest phase of a
physical being's life, providing they are not killed.  Some species have
members which are strong enough to live beyond this into a
post-reproductive stage.  Shortly after full growth is achieved,  beings'
health deteriorate at an incremental rate which lessens the aged's
ability to physically challenge rivals.
      Many species have members distinguishable into groups which we
call male and female.  Different physical attributes and different social
roles differentiate the members of sex in a species.  In some species one
sex dominates the other either by physical disproportion or by
temperament. By these definitions,  male and female,  it is the female
which bears the offspring by either laying a fertilized egg or by giving
birth to a live child.  For such species to survive,  members of both
sexes must continue to survive and remain fertile. Also,  conditions must
exist for mating to occur and full gestation in addition to keeping the
young healthy while relatively helpless.  These conditions must occur
often enough to provide sufficient numbers of that species to overcome
environmental hazards and premature deaths of species members not able to
reach a sufficient age for reproduction.  Large numbers of a species
members also allow for a greater number of genetic combinations which
increases its ability to adapt to different environments and survive.
      The larger environment which these complex multi-cellular
organisms inhabit are spheres of a variety of elements created by and
orbiting around larger spheres of hydrogen fusion reactors called stars. 
The surface of these stars is a continuous chain reaction of atomic
energy which creates heat and enormous waves of energy/particles called
light.  These waves spread out into the relative voids between these
stars until they hit something to become particles called photons.  These
photons provide nutrients to photosynthetic organisms (plants) upon the
orbiting satellites of these stars and form the basis of a food chain
upon which all other organisms rely.
      Without discussing the enormity of the time scale of the entire
universe which makes even our own planet's age pale by comparison,  the
sheer vastness of the age of Earth makes not only the lives of
individuals seem insignificant,  it makes the life span of entire species
seem insignificant.  Upon these facts and upon the certainty of death, 
we build some mental structure to provide us with the courage to forge on
and create a life which seems to us to be far more significant than the
evidence of which our senses and rationality would lead us to believe. 
Immortality by this viewpoint is unobtainable but the perpetuation of the
species can be viewed as an attempt at the impossible.  If we do indeed
view those of our own species as extensions of ourselves then we are
given cause to give ourselves to something greater and bigger than we
are,  an immortality of ilk.
      Though this universe may seem overwhelming in its breadth and
diversity, it nonetheless confronts us with its own and our own
existences.  Those who view these facts of physical existence alone
cannot hope to ever find any meaning other than that which their
imagination might see.  As I have said before,  meaning is something we
create and not something which lies waiting to be discovered.  The fact
that the universe exists pushes us to wonder why it exists.  The greater
perplexed we become,  the more we wonder why.  To come into awareness
with no clear memories and to be confronted with this bizarre monstrosity
makes us curious even if we were not so to begin with.  It is this
strangeness followed by more and more understanding which leads us to
believe that life is a means of acquiring knowledge.  Those who think in
these terms cannot help but realize the improbability of a total
understanding of the universe in any given lifetime.  For those unwilling
to dabble in speculations of eternal or numerous lifetimes, the idea that
learning is the aim of life would be disheartening.
      It is the inflexibility of the physical world which causes us to
cherish material things.  That which can give us material pleasure is
readily comprehensible.  That which causes suffrage for some post-life
reward is regarded by many as dubious to say the least.  Those who ask us
to give up that which we know for something we cannot ever hope to
understand or experience until a time when we may not be able to
understand or experience anything,  they ask a great deal. Yet there is
never a shortage of takers for this seemingly absurd offer.  Other than
humanity having no rationale whatsoever,  a thought which has crossed my
mind from time to time,  the only explanation I can think of is that this
awareness of an eternal existence is not unobtainable while we live. 
Maybe we have an awareness of another form of existence which makes such
absurd arguments make sense to us.
      From a purely logical standpoint we should ruthlessly acquire all
the resources we can to better ensure our survival.  One could say that
in a collective sense,  that is what humanity does.  Groups of people, 
particularly nations,  show savage ferocity and great amorality in
securing resources and improving their chances to survive if not dominate
all others.  At the same time,  on an individual basis humans seem to
acknowledge that such a crude form of civilization is far from desirable.
 They are more than willing to sacrifice immediate selfish gains for the
sake of the group as a whole.  Granted that this could be a biological
recognition of the primary motivation as being the perpetuation of the
species,  but it is also true that those who subordinate themselves to
the group are often aware that those who lead do not do so for the
benefit of humanity or the group as a whole.  Sometimes beings
acknowledge that they can be true to what they believe is right without
being in error even if it contributes to empowering those who are not
right.  Conflicts undoubtedly occur for often helping the many means
helping the many who are helping themselves.
      I believe that people sacrifice their comforts,  personal
desires,  and ambitions for others because they feel they get something
for it in return,  something far more valuable than any amount of wealth
can compensate for the lack of it.  This inner drive cannot come from the
circumstances or situations of our lives (other than being taught) for
the simple reason that it does not make any sense.  It runs contrary to
all that we see and experience about what the world is really all about. 
Yet often as soon as someone communicates this belief in altruism,  we
embrace it as tightly as we embrace life itself.  There are many cases
where our love for principles and morally based ideas which do not occur
as a part of nature,  becomes greater than our love for life itself. 
Maybe it is because life is harsh and unfeeling that we dare to think we
know how it should be.  Maybe it is because we cannot accept the
limitations and the helplessness which we are confronted with that we
inevitably come to wish for more than we can achieve,  some perfect world
where we gain peace through ending others' misery.  Or maybe it is
because we knew better all along.


Chapter 2  ---  Eternal Life

			     The Immortals

	     Beat fast oh heart of endless motion
	       that carries us through the shrouded stillness
	      of the omnipresent cold eternal night
	        which holds countless souls captive,
               entombed within its endless fiefdom
		 smothered in angst and robbed of sight

	     Move quickly you who dare to think
	       that you have any relevance to it all
	      or it to you or you to what is right
	        lest you may learn that nothing matters
	       to life which you may cherish or despise
	         and to death which merely continues this plight

	     No future is real and the past slips away,
	       not wanting to be remembered or relived,
	      not holding onto you nor letting you hold it
	        as you are perpetually thrown into nothingness
	       and then let to grasp at something
		 yet that something never enables you to quit

	     Constant scurrying with nowhere to go
	       is the empty fate which befalls us all
	      and holds us in the wake of endless questing
	        after truths that lose their importance
	       as easily and as often as we lose our lives
		 without diminishing our spirit's vesting

      Perhaps the most erroneous lack of judgment in my life is how
little I value material things.  To our conscious rational minds,  the
material world is everything.  If life is to exist,  then surviving to
achieve that which will prolong life at the very least can be considered
only natural and sane.  Yet I, like so many others,  have raised the
value of ideals higher than the value of life itself.  This potentially
grave error may or may not be foundationless and its veracity may well
hinge on one of the most intriguing questions that the human mind has
ever formulated.  That question is "are we mortal or are we immortal?"
      From the point of view that existence begins and ends in the
physical universe,  the mere existence of such a question epitomizes the
arrogance of the human species.  Out of fear of death or maybe delusions
of grandeur we dare to think we are above the truths of the physical
world and we think we can continue in existence for indefinite or
infinite amount of time.  Such notions would surely seem absurd were it
not for the fact that an overwhelming majority of humans on this planet
believe that they possess an immortal soul and that this intangible
indestructible force is their true selves.  Despite what I may think, 
not many people would contend that believing this could or would make it
so.  As most would see it either they are correct in this assumption or
they are mistaken.
      I am not one to be overwhelmed and moved by the ingenuity of the
human race.  I see a species mired deep in divisive and often destructive
beliefs which at times seem to defy all explanations based on reason.  It
is entirely conceivable to me that my beliefs of a relativistic world and
others beliefs in an immortal soul to be completely without a basis in
fact.  However,  the validity of my or others beliefs is not to be the
emphasis of this chapter.  I intend to discuss the ways in which
immortality is envisioned and the effects these views have upon peoples
actions.
      There appears to be two major tenets of belief in an eternal
soul.  These are the spiral type multi-life views and the single lifetime
judgmental view.  The spiral type I label as such because it maintains
that life is a circle between life and death,  and through many lifetimes
we move toward a greater or more complete understanding of the universe. 
The single life judgmental view is not completely dissimilar.  It too
presumes some pre-existent state as well as an equally outside of time
eventual resting place be it nice or nasty as the case may be.  This view
of life contends that this life forms the basis upon which a judgment
shall be rendered as to whether or not a person deserves an eternal
purgatory or an eternal heaven.  Another harder to define view is a
merger of these two which I have stated.  This other view supposes that
though we are judged according to actions in our lives,  a decision as to
our final resting place may take more than one lifetime and that we can
be given second chances to right our previous wrongs.
      Before I get into the specifics of the differences of these
subdivisional notions of eternal life I would like briefly to mention the
common effects they have upon humanity.  Frankly,  they have made
suffering more tolerable and perhaps for that reason,  more prevalent. 
Injustices can be accepted with the belief that they are merely temporary
and that in the end all wrongs will be made right.  Sacrifices are to be
rewarded and goodness along with virtue will live forever in the heart of
some benevolent god.  These beliefs most importantly say that there is
more going on here than what we can see or know.  These concepts give us
new ways of seeing so that what we see is not so much what is there but
what we wish to see there.  Few people would die for money and only fools
would die for glory but many would kill and die for ideals and the pain
and sting of death for most is lessened by the idea of an eternal soul. 
It makes losing everything for nothing a reasonable choice.
      It is difficult to say which view,  spiral or judgmental,  is
inherently more susceptible to having negative repercussions upon
societies.  Hinduism and its beliefs are of the spiral type and they seem
to have helped reinforce the caste system of social stratification to
such a degree that it lasted thousands of years.  This system included a
whole class of people labeled as untouchables doomed from birth to a sort
of social slavery.  The reincarnation theory supported this in that
whatever position they were born into was due to the sort of life they
had earned or deserved from the previous one.  Thus anyone born into
extreme wealth earned that wealth and anyone extremely poor had better
cast off any bitterness because they did something wrong to be born into
such misery and unless they accept it they might wind up in a worse
situation next time.
      The judgmental view of other religions has led to many purges of
foreign cultures to 'save' them from ideologies and behavioral patterns
thought to be evil or blasphemous.  The rationale was that they were
'cleansing' the Earth of 'heathens' who were not being murdered but
merely being sent to be judged for their 'primitive savage' beliefs. 
This view also has made many quite eager to do any actions that they were
told were good and righteous by those with the proclaimed authority to
judge such things.  Killing despite the "Thou shalt not kill" Commandment
is an example of human interpreted exemptions to supposed divine rules. 
However there is no evidence that Christians or Moslems were any more
vulnerable to persuasion and manipulation on religious grounds than were
those of different religious backgrounds.  Soldiers of all faiths were
often reassured of everlasting glory for their sacrifices and violent
deeds,  if not everlasting life.
      Both Hinduism and Buddhism can be said possess the spiral type
view of life.  It is through a series of lives and life experiences that
one comes to a state of Nirvana or total oneness with all of existence in
a blissful happy state.  This view accentuates the value of knowledge, 
particularly spiritual knowledge and it speaks of existences in
nonphysical worlds.  Though life is a continuous circle between life and
death,  neither is thought to be completely unlike the other.  It is by
trying to find the underlying force within that one enables oneself to
move further upon his or her journey of self discovery.
      Christianity and Islam tend to have a judgmental view of external
existences.  The carrot and stick approach of heaven and hell tends to
herd people to adhere to strict rules of social behavior.  Though the
judgment is supposedly left to God,  many zealous preachers and pundits
have not been shy about making their opinions known.  Religious
instruction is given to keep followers from straying from the path of
righteousness and falling prey to the manifestations of temptation. 
Thoughts about eternal life are generally expressed in human-like terms
and heaven is thought to be a sort of exclusive club where only the truly
pious can gain entrance.  I am not claiming that these are the current
beliefs of the majorities of these faiths,  only that these are the
images upon which current teachings are founded.
      How people view eternal life and their own souls varies greatly
even within particular religions.  Some people have more abstract notions
of formless consciousness' while others tend to think in more visual and
concrete terms.  Though these differences can lead to unusual and
fascinating variations among different cultures in how they think of and
express ideas of the eternal existences of their spirits as well,  the
most important theme is that they are not their bodies.  This precept
sets the stage for greater control over their worlds for they are in fact
removing themselves conceptually from the physical world and partially
entering a world of their own conception.
      As long as one views himself or herself as their bodies or even
as objects within their environments they remain susceptible to and
dependent upon such existences.  But when people withdraw further into
their own and group consciousness',  they stretch the boundaries of what
they perceive they can do and may actually increase what they are able to
do.  Believing one is a vaguely defined concept not based on or
comparable to anything in the physical world is a very powerful and
potentially dangerous thing to do.  Doing so without a solid belief
system can lead one to be open to any of the opposing forces that a
consciousness can manufacture or contact.  In most people there is no
danger so long as they accept to live by the rules of their own
existences.  It is only when people seek to control other existences
outside of themselves that they latch onto loosely defined structures
which give them greater apparent control, only to find later that they
themselves were losing control.
      I do not mean to say that any of this is absolutely real.  I only
wish to state the risks that can be run when one is unsure of what one
is.  I doubt that anyone's belief structure is without weaknesses and I
assume that if anyone was completely without doubt in himself or herself
then that person would either appear as a complete fool or as a holy
godlike person.  It is our unsuredness which keeps us searching to find
better explanations and new ways of understanding and interpreting
experiences.  How we define ourselves is crucial to what we experience
and our belief in what is possible affects what we experience.  We negate
or preclude from experience that which we believe cannot be.  It is for
this reason when we open our minds to the infinite by leaving our total
existence,  whether in size or time,  in doubt we open a perceptual world
as infinite and as expansive as space itself.


Chapter 3  ---  The Consciousness Specific Perspective

			      Mine is the Sun

			 Mine is the sun
			   and for me it shines
			  It gives me the food
			    upon which my soul dines

			 Mine is the earth,
			   its oceans and its land
			  It gives me a place
			    upon which to stand

			 Mine is the life
			   that exists everywhere
			  It gives me purpose
			    among the others there

			 Mine are the stars
			   and the vastness of space
			  for they are in me
			    as I observe their place

      There is a deeply personal way of interpreting life and its
events.  It goes beyond what is,  what is physical,  and instead
concentrates on what happens.  We can think of motion while thinking of
objects in motion.  The connection between what is and what happens seems
unbreakable yet with some effort we can think of happenings without
thinking of their causes or originating elements.  A far easier task is
to think about the objects alone rather than the changes in the universe
alone.  When this approach is carried to how one perceives life it is
possible to negate the importance of all objects and their interactions
except for how they affect you,  the living consciousness perceiving them.
      When something happens in the world,  perhaps in some far off
land you have never been to,  you can stop and ask yourself "How does
this affect me?  What steps should I take to change my ideas about the
world or about life?  What viewpoints does this challenge me to consider
or reconsider?".  How we believe the world functions and our opinions of
it are constantly put to the test every time we interact with the world
merely by observing it.  If we settle deeply into this perspective,  what
is happening becomes merely an impetus,  a push which moves us toward a
higher realization of ourselves.  The entire universe becomes nothing but
a staged play for an audience of one,  the perceiver consciousness.
      The perspective rests on at least two suppositions;  the
existence of a perceiver and a way or patterned form in which there are
more real or higher realizations which we are being pushed into growing
into.  That a perceiver consciousness exists I doubt would be contested
for anyone reading this or for me to be writing this,  a limited
intelligence or partially knowledgeable consciousness must exist.  My
consciousness must be limited for the purpose of writing this to affect
some sort of change which could probably be done more directly by a
completely knowledgeable consciousness by direct manipulation.  If anyone
were to be reading this,  I would assume they too had limited knowledge
otherwise there would be no point in reading it as they would already
know what it said.  
      Given the assumption that at least one perceiving consciousness
and possibly many others exist,  the way in which I perceive my own
consciousness as well as others pushes me to conclude that other possibly
'higher' realizations also exist.  The fact that my conscious knowledge
is rather limited and that new knowledge in forms of new experiences does
affect changes in myself at least to the extent of expanding my conscious
memory and triggering choices which I must make in how to deal with these
events.  All of this leads me to believe that some ascent into more
knowledgeable states occurs as a necessity of existence.  Just what these
states are is up to others to decide.  What should be kept in mind
though,  is that the accumulation of experience tends to push people
toward more flexibility in how they regard others and  life,  and that
this growth often destroys value systems which are not adaptable to
larger more inclusive organizational systems.  In a phrase,  they become
more 'open minded'.
      Obviously more openness to viewpoints and broader reaching
concepts are not the only points of 'spiritual' growth.  Although greater
empathy and understanding may indeed be prerequisites for such change, 
they are not the end of the road.  It is the speculation of such
universal notions which shapes,  distinguishes,  and defines
consciousness' and I shall not push my limited views upon others.   I
instead seek to set up an organized approach in how we view such notions
in a way which provides for consensus yet does not constrict the creative
notions of others who may ponder such subjects.  For this reason,  I turn
from the 'where' of growth to the 'how'.
      While still maintaining the consciousness specific perspective, 
I shall attempt to expound on how growth occurs.  In  RELATIVISM 2  I
stated that conceptual growth is bound by the limitations of perception. 
One can increase his or her own concept of their own existence only to
the limits of their own perceptual worlds.  Growth can defy the confines
of an individual consciousness by the incorporation of other
consciousness' into a singular common consciousness.  How one views what
his or her own existence is defines how he or she can grow conceptually
and still maintain an individual ego.  Yet these sentences do not state
the means by which growth occurs.
      There are two aspects of spiritual growth which I have yet to
address.  These are expansiveness and choice.  Although I have stated
that growth can be ascribed to ones concept of oneself becoming more and
more inclusive,  I do not wish for this to be confused with
expansiveness.  As we live,  we continually gain new experiences which
our conscious minds can indiscriminately draw upon.  This accumulation of
data could be said to expand our consciousness itself.  If we indeed do
have an immortal soul which can go through numerous incarnations then
this simple expansion through the accumulation of knowledge and
experience could indeed be most revealing as to the nature of the
universe.  This expansion could fuel our growth by continually forcing us
to reassess ourselves in relation to our worlds and thus one day lead to
more inclusive definitions.
      Choice is a much more complicated subject.  If one believes to
any degree in fate,  then their belief in choice is commensurably
diminished.  I doubt that either belief will fail to gain its share of
supporters and detractors for some time to come.  I shall sidestep this
debate by saying that most can conceive of if not accept the statement
that we have a large degree of choice over our actions.  Although
circumstances may abruptly be thrust upon us,  often we  consciously
decide upon a course of action to take.  This can be used as another
measure of gauging growth.  It could be said that when we choose we stand
at a crossroad with one choice being correct and the others leading us
away from growth.  Though different people have different opinions over
what is right and wrong,  it is correct to say that our determination of
whether or not we made the best choice is based upon our perceptions of
the effects of that course of action.
      I will concede that some judgments of the appropriateness of
certain actions or inactions seem to come from an internal judgment
making apparatus.  We can be sure that we have made a correct choice or
have 'done the right thing' even though the consequences can prove to
cause great suffering upon ourselves and those whom we love.  When this
happens we sometimes question not only our choices by also our
conceptions about the value of,  or justice inherent in,  the universe
itself.  Sometimes we question our own worth and whether or not we are
deserving of good fortune.
      So we can concentrate on the effects we have upon our environment
in how we judge our own worth and we can judge the effects that the
environment has upon us and our notions of ourselves.  Undoubtedly,  we
will continue to appraise ourselves by our successes and failures or by
our attempts to manipulate our environments to achieve results which are
beneficial or pleasing to us.  Whether the results of these efforts
benefit others or prove harmful to others will probably eventually affect
how we judge our own values as we inch closer to a greater feeling of
affinity with all else in our environments.  Judging the effects the
world has upon us is more difficult because there is no set scale with
which to measure.  What we are or may be is constantly changing and what
we experience can affect us in ways which we may not be consciously aware
of now but we will be painfully aware of later.
      The consciousness specific perspective can be very powerful for
an individual to take.  The chance of negative use is great for it
relinquishes all importance of anything and anyone in ones environment to
subservience in how they affect the given individual perceiving that
viewpoint.  This opens the door for a complete absence of morality which
on one hand expands the options that one might consider,  yet on the
other opens one up to do oneself harm by seeming to harm those whom may
be there for the very purpose of teaching empathy.  The potential
benefits of this viewpoint go far beyond merely better understanding and
controlling ones environment.  It places an individual consciousness
squarely in the middle of all that is happening in the universe and it
impels that consciousness to recognize the significance that those
happenings have for itself and its growth.  So often we forget that all
which happens to us is indelibly a part of us and that we are lost when
we try to separate ourselves from it.


Chapter 4  ---  The Concept of Fate

				Destiny

		    All that mortal man
		      may ever hope to achieve
		     exists upon the whim
		       of the great god Destiny

		    A notion of total order
		      born out of a chaotic world
		     mesmerizes us still
		       as its legacy is unfurled

		    All that is and will be
		      shall be forever in its debt
		     and all who bow before it 
		       are released from guilt and regret

		    Believers benefit little
		      for freedom pays the cost
		     to keep the idea alive
		       even as life itself becomes lost

      If the concept of eternal life could be said to be a major
impetus to drive beings fearlessly to reckless actions,  then the concept
of fate could be said to be the great pacifier.  Though the idea of fate
or destiny can move people just as boldly to extreme acts,  I believe
that overall it tends to reinforce the status quo.  It explains all
things merely by stating that they were meant to be.  By whom and for
what purpose is assuredly something not all hold in agreement.  Some
people also believe that some things are fated yet other things are not. 
Whom one marries and when one dies fall into the category of what some
believe to be fated even if they do not believe that smaller less
significant decisions in their lives are equally predetermined.
      I shall begin by immediately attacking what I have just stated. 
Many devastating wars were begun because one side thought it was its
destiny to prevail over the other.  All great leaders could be said to
have possessed a sense of destiny in how they perceived themselves and
this feeling possibly may have propelled them into doing the things which
history has recorded them for.  These examples I would like to
distinguish from a hindsighted notion of destiny that historians may
perceive when looking back upon events and deciding that certain events
seemed inevitable.  I mean by those examples a precipitous belief that an
event or outcome beyond ones control was inevitable and that the given
perception acted as an impetus to events.
      Given the historical significance that notions of fate and divine
will have played upon the course of human history,  one might wonder why
I feel that the notion of fate is an inhibitor agent and not an
instigating one.  I say that fate as a concept is a detractor from the
forces of change because I do not believe that most people really believe
that they are destined for greatness.  It also may well be possible that
for every one person who felt destined for greatness and achieved it, 
hundreds held similar notions yet failed. (This does not diminish the
significance of the role such feelings had played in their lives.) 
Nonetheless,  the notion of fate seems to reinforce acceptance of
organizational systems of society by giving them a philosophical
justification in addition to their physical realities of existence.
      More than anything else,  the idea behind fate is that we are
deprived of choice.  Some things are meant to happen regardless of any
actions we might take against them.  What is interesting about the notion
that ones fate can be known ahead of time is that only those predictions
which come true are examples of fate.  Those which were erroneous
obviously were not fated to be because they did not happen.  Predictions
not dated can remain to be believed indefinitely.  Fate is generally not
perceived ahead of time but instead exists more as an after-the-fact
explanation of events.  The implicit meaning of fate,  whether aimed at
the future or the past,  is that events can happen only one way.  Our
perceived control or lack of control is affected by any belief in fate. 
Some would say we never possessed any real choice while others would
contend that we do or did once have choice but that the tide of events
make our choices inevitable.  Some believe that what we are experiencing
now actually happened long ago when we once had a choice but now the
story is set and no adjustments can be made.
      So what does the notion of fate propel us to do,  if anything, 
or prevent us from doing.  As I have said,  the notions of fate seem to
affect the flow of events when those notions are forward in nature. If we
believe something may happen we may act according to that belief or not, 
but when we are convinced that something is fated to occur then we may
otherwise be more committed to our planned course of action or be more
fatalistic if we stand opposed.  If that conviction was misfounded we may
need more time to recover from that setback and reassess our beliefs. 
Believing that something currently existing or something yet to be is a
matter of fate can prevent us from deciding to oppose that person, 
thing,  or idea.  We either give up all reason to pursue causes we
believe to be doomed or we participate in them without expectations for
any success.
      Some people use the notion of fate to predict what will occur. 
If all things must occur according to some preset order or plan,  then it
would stand to reason that these overall trends could become known and an
individual might accurately predict the outcome of events.  This goes
beyond merely believing that one can foresee the outcome of events yet to
be.  This belief in fate means that one believes that the outcome can
only happen a certain way and that a given result MUST occur.  Failures
in divination are perceived as failures of the perception of such
occurrences and the belief in the rigidity of order is maintained.
      I do not believe in any prophecies except for self-fulfilling
ones.  Thus I believe that when someone is able to predict (at a
statistically meaningful rate) the outcomes of events,  they are
affecting directly or indirectly those outcomes or their own life's
notoriety.  Whether one believes he or she can tell how events will occur
(regardless of their beliefs of fate) depends on how they regard
themselves,  whether or not they deem themselves capable.
      Humanity's belief in fate is long-standing and most likely shall
not greatly change.  Since belief in fate needs not to mean that such
fated happenings can or should be known beforehand,  it is a tough
concept to prove or disprove.  Though I have said that the notion of fate
may have a sedative effect upon the aspirations of humanity,  hopes too
can be believed as fated to be achieved.  If indeed faith in ones
convictions as well as faith in ones chances for successfully achieving
ones dreams determines the likelihood of their outcomes,  then the
concept of fate can prove to be an invaluable tool to helping one achieve
the impossible.


Chapter 5  ---  Seeing Beyond Abstractions

				  Once is me

			       Once is me
				 yet I am
				every time
				  close at hand

			       Over and under
				 above is below
				neither I am
				  neither I know

			       Yet and then
				 both are now
				never was I 
				  only how

			       Once is me
				 more is less
				falling away
				  from the crest

      How to categorize life,  the experiences of living,  thinking, 
feeling masses of stuff such as ourselves,  this is no easy task. 
Explanation after explanation comes and goes,  is believed and then
discarded but never is there any real answer.  I have listed thus far a
few ways in which we view life.  We can look solely at physical existence
and delve into its hidden past hoping to find further clarification on
what exactly we exist as and how it came to be.  If we believe we are
spirits temporarily residing in this world then such truths,  if they can
be definitively ascertained,  lose meaning to us.  I do not presume that
there is any one definition of life that will ever please all nor do I
think that I would likely stumble upon it.  I would say this might doom
me to fail if life is indeed a quest for the perfect theory to explain it.
      This explanation which I shall now discuss really isn't one.
Whether this is some sneaky way of evading the limits I set upon myself I
do not know.  Regardless,  here goes.  We can look at the physical world
and we can look at its processes of action and we can look at its effects
upon us.  Another way of interpreting things is just to experience it
all.  In other words,  believing that there is no need to explain what is
for the whole lump sum is constantly explaining itself.  Sure this seems
a cop-out but how else can anyone explain it.  We can look at the parts
(existences),  we can look at the processes (learning,  growing,  and
actions) or we can see the whole picture without subtitles.
      To see life as a series of events,  of moments,  connected
together for the sole reason of perception goes beyond any feeble
attempts to make sense of it.  I know this sounds stupid and I always
have hated it when someone suggests that the meaning of life lies beyond
our capacity to understand it.  Therefore in the interest of keeping my
self-respect intact I hope to clear up this supposed ambiguity.  Thought
is a way to represent reality by transforming it into abstractions which
we can manipulate.  Existence itself lies beyond our abstractions and
does not in an obvious manner change when we manipulate its abstractions,
 or symbols of reality.  Words,  memories,  of objects or events,  and
concepts of order and natural laws are all attempts at copying our
experiences to be used and organized by our minds.  Yet the copy never
compares to the original.
      So if this is all true, how can we ever hope to find any answers.
 If the only way we can judge something is by abstractions about it,  how
can we know it.  Pure experience can be recalled and relived,  although
we know not whether distortions occur in our records of them or in our
abilities to recall them.  Yet meaning,  that ever elusive all inclusive
anchor we all long for cannot be derived from experience.  It must be
invented.  Are the alternatives to live closer to the center of life
while depriving ourselves of any organizing factor,  and conversely,  to
build some conjectural basis to cut ourselves off from what we are truly
experiencing yet experiencing the peace of mind even false understanding
brings?  Neither option seems very appealing.
      Focusing on events alone void of any interpretations does seem
desirable even though a little bit naive.  Detachment from ourselves, 
our hopes,  our dreams,  wishes and intents does appear to be hard to
achieve.  Many would also doubt whether or not this achievement is
desirable.  Here I am not speaking of detachment from oneself such as
monks may seek,  but instead a fusion of oneself with the entire picture.
 Rather than observing or experiencing events,  one becomes a piece in
the puzzle of events which unfold around him or her,  a sort of
bird's-eye vision of oneself within the sphere of all existence.  Rather
than the drop perceiving the sea,  the whole picture is taken in at once,
 the drop,  the sea,  and infinity.
      This approach to viewing life appears to be useless.  Without
inspiring meaning,  no courses of action could stem from it.  Perception
itself is no theory to be proved or disproved,  it merely is.  However, 
the destruction of the walls conceptually between the perceiver and the
perceptions may indeed result in the formation of a new concept.  This
does not change the fact that a concept is nonetheless a representation
of experience which can only lead to a dilution of ones ability to
perceive.  To a large extent we do each see ourselves in existence in
communion with our world,  otherwise we could not function effectively
within it.  Saying that this is some kind of revelation would be
erroneous.  It is true however,  that we do not continuously see
ourselves and our world coexisting in a mutual sharing or blending.
      Maybe the concepts of death and object permanence cut us off from
a feeling of oneness with our environment.  We perceive that one day we
will be gone yet our world will still be here,  wherever here may be.  We
and physical existence are bound to one day part and this may be why we
stop believing that this is us,  that we are our surroundings including
ourselves.  Yet if the events we experience are us,  then events rise
above the din of mere existence.  We are happenings and though happenings
occur in time,  they are not time.  Though they involve objects,  they
are not objects.  And though they abound with limitations they are as
lucid as a dream and as boundless as the concept of infinity.


Chapter 6  ---  Guiding Spirits

			       Saviors Unseen

			Angel in the darkness,
			  guardian of my spirit
			 show me the way out
			   of my troubles
			  by lending me your
			    pristine vision

			Lead me to a safe haven
			  far from this bleak place
			 which forever taunts and tries
			   to break me
			  by stealing all which
			    I hold dear

			Show yourself to me
			  for even as I am nothing
			 but an open book to all those
			   beings such as thee,
			  I cannot alone uncover
			    me beneath the dust

      For much of human history a belief in supernatural entities
enthralled with the mire of human affairs has greatly affected humanity's
perception of its place in the universe.  Whether it took the form of the
human appearing overlords such as the Greek gods or vague nonphysical
beings who intervene in the natural courses of our lives,  such views
have been common to us all.  Polytheistic religions obviously deal with
these notions in more detail,  yet even in single god religions ancient
polytheistic traditions have affected the very souls of these religions. 
Entities form around functions of practical use to people such as
providing for a good harvest,  protection,  and the granting of wishes. 
There are so many different aspects to our lives that is hard to
personify one who does everything all the time.  Though belief in a grand
controller is predominant in most religions, many religious officials
will accommodate those who may wish to establish ties with other
religious icons of their particular sect which seem more identifiable and
more personal.
      The specifics of these spirits varies from culture to culture but
their functions do not.  Basically their functions are to reward us with
things that please us or at the very least,  to keep away that which may
cause us harm.  We behave according to our perceptions of what these
beings' expectations for us may be.  Helpful spirits we try to please to
obtain rewards and bad spirits we generally try to keep away by either
appeasing them or directly confronting them.  This confrontation usually
requires the assistance of another 'friendly' spirit to enable us to
triumph over the negative one.  I am only discussing these perceived
spiritual beings in regards to how they affect us,  material beings, 
because that is how they are generally viewed.  We tend to be concerned
with ideas that have practical applications or tangible effects and
people for the most part are just not moved by notions of 'higher'
existences which are disinterested observers.  Yet if someone adds the
possibility that these beings can help or hurt us,  humanity's attention
becomes greatly increased.
       Self-perception is a key to how people react to these ideas of
controlling entities.  When people generally perceive themselves in a
positive light,  something almost completely determined by cultural
circumstances,  they try to align themselves with positively influencing
spirits.  If however,  they fear that the requisites for those spirits
aid are too difficult to realistically believe they can be achieved, 
then they may become fearful enough of it (or them) to join opposing
forces.  The accessibility to the positive spirit(s) favor also varies
from culture to culture.  When those standards are easily met,  more
people will choose to align themselves with the positive healthy forces
rather than those which they themselves perceive as destructive or
self-centered.  If the culture instead views winning the positive's favor
as a privilege of the few rather than a prospect open to everyone,  most
would align themselves either against this entire view or against their
perceived elitist enemy spirits.  Those who have negative
self-perceptions are given ideas of higher beings which share their
feelings or frustrations and are inadvertently given ideas of higher
beings with which to forge alliances.
      To best serve humanity,  views which have a large degree of
acceptance by positive spirits towards the bulk of humanity should
predominate.  If the average person of society can identify him or
herself to a spirit which cares about life and helping goodness prosper, 
then that person will automatically tend to act in similar ways.  Yet if
those same spirits are judged harsh and unforgiving upon normal human
transgressions,  that culture itself may come to align itself with a
perceived negative entity.
      Acceptance by positive spirits can be perceived as easy or
difficult and this can affect whether or not one is willing to court
their favor.  If acceptance is easy,  direct change in behavior is not
greatly affected.  Indirect change is harder to estimate for once one is
perceived to be protected by the good against evil,  that persons entire
life may be changed.  He or she might aid causes which that person feels
are good or may fearlessly challenge those that they feel are wrong or
negative.  On the other hand if acceptance is perceived as difficult, 
then direct change can be extremely noticeable.  Indeed,  in some
cultures winning the favor of some benevolent spirit may dictate the
entire behavioral pattern for that individual's lifetime.
      It may seem a bit simplistic to categorize perceived guiding
spirits as positive or negative.  Sometimes a spirit's speciality cannot
be easily distinguished as being either good or bad.  Also,  many people
frequently ask positive spirits' aid in pursuing courses of action which
may seem to others as being blatantly selfish or destructive to another
person or persons.  Some cultures believe that killing something or
someone is a way to please a positive spirit.  Those who believe in an
omnipotent benevolent spirit which loves all beings also believe that it
created a world of such misfortune and degradation that it often
surpasses our willingness to recognize it as such.  Despite the
incongruities,  the general thrust of the argument of the 'higher'
spirits argument is that there are such beings which do have different, 
possibly opposing aims,  and that these beings are available to aid lowly
beings such as ourselves as long as we are of a like mind (and
compliant).  Good spirits will aid us to do good things and bad spirits
will aid us or cause us to do bad things.
      The power of choice is greatly emphasized in this view of
existence.  No factor is as great as the possibility that we are open to
choose amongst the various choices of whom to affiliate ourselves with. 
This decision making can be believed to form a judgment upon which we
shall one day be tried.  The correct choice depends upon which spirit or
spirits are the stronger and will prevail over the others should a
contest occur.  Such notions as supernatural rewards and punishments
concepts exclude or limit the ideas of fate and destiny.  Predestined
failures cannot be condemned if their shortcomings were an inevitable
result of their conception.  Likewise,  all success one achieves would
belong to the one responsible for them and the idea of fate robs one from
such responsibility.  The idea of guiding spirits can apply to notions
like fate though.  These spirits which we concede,  if we believe in
them,  can affect control over our lives could quite conceivably rule
over our entire lives.  This belief would not justify a parallel notion
that we could be held liable for our mistakes.
      These two divergent views,  that of our being mere puppets of
'higher' more powerful consciousness' and that we have a clear choice
over our lives,  over our beliefs,  and over which higher consciousness
we may turn to,  they exist in many simultaneously.  Just as our own
physical world has its rules,  our perceived notions of a higher
spiritual reality is thought to have its own rules.  The first is that we
cannot be forced into making mistakes but are free to make our own
mistakes.  This enables us to maintain a belief that we have control over
our own actions.  The idea that even these powerful guiding spirits have
rules they must obey points to an even greater notion of order in the
universe.  Mighty titans like good spirits and bad spirits can battle it
out in an infinite battlefield yet even they must play by certain rules
and pay the price when they break those rules.  Again,  I am not saying
that any of these speculations are true,  only that these are believed by
people and I believe that what others believe affects what this universe
is all about.  Imagined friends or foes could prove just as helpful or as
deadly as real ones.
      These 'higher' spirits to me represent ways of bending the rules.
 When we form a life or a world of existence in which to enter into,  we
do so according to certain preset conditions which regulate what we are
and what we are not,  as well as what we can and cannot do.  'Higher'
spirits which we can appeal to are ways to admit a partial defeat without
conceding the game.  We admit that we have gotten ourselves into more
trouble than we can deal with,  so we look for a way out which can only
be achieved by momentarily stepping outside the bounds of what we believe
to be possible.  This enables us to return to our previous circumstances
with only slightly more favorable chances for a desirable outcome.  I am
not saying that these 'spirits' are have no purposes or intents of their
own created by material beings' expectations of them.  Yet I do think
that the need to create or sustain them at all is for the purpose of
defying the bounds which we ourselves sought to establish.
      There is one point which I have not yet discussed and that is how
we preserve our notions about freewill.  Why this is important is obvious
to me because without freewill,  the ability to choose among different
courses of action,  you have no consciousness' and without consciousness,
 no life.  All of life would become a farce.  When we conceive of
entities powerful enough to break the rules for us on occasion we give
them their own limitations as I have previously mentioned.  We retain
freewill by believing that in the end we can only be hurt by our
decisions,  not by the powers that be.  Yet we can and do ask that these
spirits remove for us those rights from others by giving us unfair
advantages simply because we,  not they,  bothered to ask.  Any
intervention upon our own behalf involves removing from someone or from
events,  the possibility of behaving any other way than the way we
choose.  Thus for that one moment in which we seek any divine
intervention we raise the self above its environment and treat all else
as objects to be toyed with.  Therefore,  the belief that guiding spirits
must obey rules of solicitation applies to the self only as others are
clearly at risk of having their choices robbed from them if we should
(and could) seek such miraculous aid for ourselves.  They are at risk of
being puppets of higher consciousness' while we are free to control our
own lives.  We see ourselves and others as equals until we decide to
break the rules of existence.  Then and only then,  it is the self which
seeks to control and yet perceives itself as remaining free from control.
      This is a problem which is rarely dealt with.  Such controlling
spirits are not thought to be a great influence by most upon daily
activity.  Intervention pleas to such perceived beings is for most people
infrequent and the expectations for success do not often run high.  Yet
when we do appeal for such assistance we ask for others even indirectly
to be affected by controls which we would wish to assume others could not
achieve over ourselves.  To desire such providence is to momentarily
destroy the affinity which we have with our environment and to relegate
all of existence as subservient to our own needs.


Chapter 7  ---  The Life Story Perspective

			     Each One of Us

		 Each one of us is a performer,
		   we are actors comics and such
		  giving the performance of our lives
		    to an audience outside our touch
		   and though safely within our guise,
		     we have never before risked so much

		 Each one of us has one part to play
		   and only one chance to play it well
		  We will always be linked to this role
		    when others remember and tell
		   of whether we reached any of our goals
		     and of whether we stood tall or fell

		 Each one of us is truly privileged
		   to be playing within life's hallowed halls
		  and those of us who are truly blessed
		    courageously answer all curtain calls
		   hoping only to at their best
		     when at last the curtain falls

      The realities of physical existence give birth to a certain way
of viewing life.  It enables us to single out a single lifetime apart
from its context.  It may be said this is no different to how each of us
views our own lives,  yet also we learn from other past examples as what
to expect from life in general.  We see life as a series of events
beginning at birth and culminating at death.  In between these two points
exists what we tend to call ones life story.  This may seem to be just
adding a new term to things I have already mentioned but even if this
alone were my purpose,  a new chapter would be justified for this is a
very important term.
      From our earliest childhoods we are enthralled by the telling of
stories.  These experiences shape what we come to expect from life
itself.  Stories have a beginning,  a setting of the stage for the drama
which is yet to come.  Events build in an interesting and easily
identifiable way which makes us concerned with what is happening. 
Purposeful action is what stories are primarily concerned with and
recognizably determined effects are given to satisfy our rising
curiosities.  Finally and most importantly there is a conclusion which
puts the story in its proper perspective showing us the event or
condition to which all else was a preamble.  The main situation is
resolved,  its effects revealed,  and we are contented that we have
learned something valuable.  This may seem a bit over generalized but
these are the basics of what stories are all about.
      How this applies to our lives is quite obvious,  to me at least. 
We gain from these experiences the notion that in the end everything will
make sense.  Once we reach the end of the line and look back upon our
lives,  we will finally understand what it was all about.  We know of a
beginning,  our births,  and we sense a building up from the accumulation
of knowledge and memories which pushes us inevitably to new and different
ways of interpreting our relationships with existence.  This sense of
climbing combined with our instinctive needs to rationalize or organize
our experiences puts our lives within the context of a story.  Each
individual experiencing existence is the protagonist in his or her own
life's story.  The story is thought to have an overall purpose of
enlightenment or understanding.
      Knowledge is fundamental to this approach of viewing life. 
Knowledge must not only have a degree of permanence and memories an
indefinite lifetime,  they must also have meanings of some importance. 
The reason that knowledge must have a concreteness is that if our lives
are indeed stories to be told,  then as we understand stories,  they must
have a meaning or state some kind of truth about something.  This insight
or piece of information,  it would reasonably follow,  would need to be
recognized by someone or something to have any meaning.  And why meaning?
 Why would anyone tell a story at all if not to teach a lesson,  provide
someone with another perspective of what life can be or bring,  or even
merely to entertain someone?  Since no story would be told for no reason
we would assume our life stories,  far more real and personal,  would
equally not be without purposes.
      Who then would we be living our lives for?  We benefit from the
knowledge embedded within our recorded histories of the human culture. 
In a sense,  we are part of an immense multi-bodied organism which will
absorb our lifetimes' works and accomplishments into its collective
consciousness in the same way it has imparted others lives into our own. 
So do we live solely for the benefit of our progeny or do we ourselves
carry on the lessons  learned by a lifetime's worth of troubles and
tribulations.  Those who believe in an extended life after death might
say that our lives' lessons are meant to learned by us because no one so
far as we know is experiencing our individual lives so completely or
intensely as we ourselves.  But would they deny the influence which we
have upon others as being insignificant or less important consequences of
our own inner struggle to achieve a greater understanding of the universe
or ourselves?
      Conversely,  those who believe that existence after death in any
form is some sort of deluded dream by a fated individual unable to accept
his or her own mortality,  would they most likely say that the only
meaning of our lives (if there be any at all) lies in how we affect the
course of others existences?  If we have no existences other than our own
physical bodies then no meaning can exist for us after those bodies are
dead.  The only meaning that can be left would be in the lingering
effects we made upon the chain of events during our lifetimes.
      I do not wish to imply that all people view themselves in
relation to this story type way of organizing our experiences.  However, 
the way life works,  such a pronounced reflection of this outlook is upon
how we view ourselves that I doubt anyone is completely free of its
influence.  Most people search for meaning out of their lives.  Whether
or not this comes from their experiences of stories and are attempts to
relate this to their own personal experiences is unimportant.  When they
search for meaning,  what they have to search through is what their
memories of those experiences can provide.  Included in these experiences
is all that they have read or been taught because,  as I have said
before,  that too is an experience.  To organize these experiences,  some
sort of order would have to be imposed so one could sort through them in
accordance to what one viewed as important enough or extreme enough facts
or experiences to be long remembered.  These framework concepts,  ones
which organize experience to be understood and remembered,  provide some
sway over what is considered important and what is discarded.  It is
through the growing body of information we possess and our needs to
organize that information,  that we perpetually run into the life story
perspective.
      To view life as an unfolding story is also to view its events
within a time perspective.  Each event occurs within its proper place in
the chain of causes and effects which we experience.  In this sense,  one
could say that the life story perspective is how we remember the events
of our lives whenever we attempt to recall them in chronological order. 
Though this does not overtly require the total structure of the story
form,  it can lead one to wonder where all of these events are leading to.
      How this life story perspective affects a person is hard to
precisely define.  It pushes us to believe that life is supposed to make
sense.  This may lead to the belief that the universe is conceivably
within reach of a being's attempts to make some conceptual model or order
out of it.  No doubt some would and some do chase this comprehensive
understanding even though they are unsure or even skeptical of their
chances for success.  Other effects of this perspective may be that some
are convinced that their life story is destined for greatness and glory. 
I doubt that this is so much an outcome of this perspective as of an
inflated opinion of themselves.
      It is difficult to ascribe specific courses of action from what I
have come to call the life story perspective because it is so much a
basic part of how we as people view ourselves.  We see ourselves as an
outgrowth of our experiences and the grim reminders of death which
surround us force us to eventually frame our experiences within the
context of our perceived prescribed lifetimes.  What we expect from our
own lives is based on the lives of those who came before whether we are
conscious of it or not.  Though to some extent we say that we are
different or special,  in the end we realize we are not.


Chapter 8  ---  The Other Self

			      I cannot see me

	      I cannot see me
		I can stare into a mirror
		  but only a stranger stares me back
		 sharing a face like mine
		yet isn't me

	      I cannot hear me
		when I speak of what I believe
		  trying my damnedest to make a sound or stir
		 to break the grip of fates upon me
		or the silence of eternity

	      I cannot feel me
		I cannot even feel what is me
		  body or spirit,  both always elude me
		 leaving me to wonder why only I
		am not even given me

	      I cannot know me
		I cannot know what I am or will be
		  for what I am will only be shown long hence
		 the last light these eyes shall see
		and I,  a mere memory

      When each of us thinks of ourselves we may think about our
bodies,  our experiences,  our hopes and dreams,  or about our own
perspectives and opinions about our lives,  things in life,  or of life
itself.  All of these are typical concepts by which we define what and
who we are.  All of these also are known best by ourselves,  those
persons directly experiencing them.  Somewhere along the line though we
learn of another self,  one that we do not define and therefore have much
less direct control over.  Each person eventually learns that others
perceptions of him or her do not always match those which one has of
oneself.  Out of this concept of other beings capable of conscious
concept formation and manipulation is born the concept of the other self.
      We fear the other self.  We often feel it is a threat to our own
concepts of ourselves.  If it does not match our own concepts of who each
of us may be,  we go out of our way to show others that they are
mistaken. If we are quite secure in our concepts of ourselves we may
become brazen to criticism yet NEVER do we go beyond being bothered by
those who are embittered,  fearful,  resentful,  or hurt by the fact of
our own individual existences.  To a very real extent we acknowledge that
we are,  to a degree,  that which others perceive us to be.
      Now I'll admit that there are exceptions to be made.  We can
dismiss others opinions of ourselves for any number of reasons.  That we
do not value their opinion or consider them as equals worthy of passing
judgment upon ourselves is one that is often used by those who have high
opinions of themselves to defer negative reviews.  Another is that people
with extremely negative opinions of us are not well-informed and that if
they only knew us better their opinions would match our own.  (I tend to
use collective terms as the continued use of himself/herself is awkward.)
 These and other insulating devices can help us deal with the presence
and influence of the other self.
      We do battle with the other self in a very direct way.  We form a
concise model of who we are and attempt to successfully project this
image into the psyche of others.  The degree to which we are successful
at this determines greatly how much of a success we are in gaining what
we wish from life because so much of the attainment of goals rests upon
the ability to persuade people to our own viewpoints.  I do not
necessarily mean to deceive people or to coerce them into helping us
against their own interests.  These are also helpful by some perspectives
to our obtaining the objects of our desires yet for now I am limiting
this dissertation to self-image projection.
      With few exceptions,  most of us like to have other's views of us
much the same or better than they view themselves even if we do not feel
worthy of such prestigious consideration.  No one likes to be 'looked
down upon' by others and everyone enjoys the benefits of being respected
by others.  The absence of persecution is a benefit which is universally
valued and is bestowed by those with authority and influence to others
whom they feel are worthy or whom they consider as equals.  To a large
degree we attempt to control the other self out of an instinctual desire
for self-preservation.
      The other self to which I keep referring could be said to be the
lump sum of how we are viewed by others.  If many have positive images of
us or ones which correspond closely with how we view ourselves,  we can
easily tolerate a few deviants.  When the deviant becomes the rule then
our real self,  that which we perceive directly,  is imperiled.  Due to
the conformatory nature of our societies,  we feel pressure to change our
behavior to overcome those deficiencies perceived by others.  Our
concepts of ourselves are endangered by our reliance on the feedback from
others which continues to reinforce our beliefs about ourselves.  Too
much derision cannot help but raise doubts about whether or not we are
mistaken about our own concepts of ourselves.  And lastly,  our status
becomes endangered due to the retaliation that the bulk of society
directs toward deviation from the norms,  whether by direct action or by
the failure to provide assistance in times of need.
      Though perception of the other self (by other definitions
perhaps) is normal and our desires to control it as best we can is
rational from a self-protectionist point of view,  is there another
mystical reason why we fear it or seek to dominate it?  Is it possible
that our existences can be shaped or affected by others opinions of it? 
I can say that we are responsive to at least our own perceptions on how
others perceive us.  How we feel about how others feel about us shapes
the nature of our interactions with them.  Many believe that our actions
do constitute a basis for others and for our own perceptions of
ourselves.  If these actions are shaped by others attitudes or our
expectations of others attitudes then this does indeed change the basis
upon which we build our images of ourselves through our actions.
      As we continue to reassure ourselves that we are what we think we
are and it is our own perspective which counts the most,  the ever
vigilant and indifferently cold toll of time makes its impression upon
us.  Soon we realize we shall be no more and all that shall remain are
the impressions and possible misconceptions which we left upon those who
shall briefly remain.  Others opinions of us do have their significance
and sadly,  that significance is in no way proportional to the accuracy
of those opinions.  These different versions of ourselves play many
different roles in each of the sagas of each person whom we may meet. 
Despite our best attempts to control the outcome of our interactions with
others,  in the end how we are perceived shall be up to them as long as
we believe that they are as we,  independent.
      The real fear of the other self comes from the fact that it is
the inverse of something which we feel gives us so much power;  the
ability to conceptualize things.  We take abstract dynamic events and
reduce them to recognizable and predictable patterns of experience.  The
perceptual expectations give us a sense of power or control over them. 
Once we can conceptualize something or understand it we can soon
manipulate it either conceptually or directly.  Reducing chaos into order
and randomness into predictability is the power of consciousness.  It is
the fear that we too are but helpless objects to be identified, 
classified,  and thus have its importance nullified by being so
predictable as to have its very existence become unimportant,  even
redundant.  The other self represents our place in someone else's schema
of what life is and what is to be expected.  We either fulfill their
expectations or deny to live up to their expectations,  both helpless and
unaware of what those expectations might be.
      At the same time,  we incorporate others into ourselves.  Gaining
what we perceive are the points of view or ways of looking at things that
other people may possess,  we enlarge our own consciousness'.  To do so
we must believe that they are predictable,  otherwise we could not use
them to speculate upon how those persons might react to a hypothetical
problem.  After a while these person's perspectives may meld into our own
and we may consult them without realizing we are doing so.  Though this
multi-perspective consciousness building may be considered somewhat of a
compliment,  when it is our own perspectives which are taken,  the fact
that our whole outlooks can be thought to be reducible to a few
predicative formulas can be disheartening.  When these formulas are
erroneous,  we can feel we are being cheated by being praised or cursed
for insights which we did not possess.
      It is not a pleasant thought that we use others minds as much or
more than we use their bodies or their time to service our needs.  Each
of us likes to think we have sole control over our destiny and that no
chart,  data,  or formula can determine what we can or will say or do in
any given circumstance.  We feel quite comfortable with the fact that we
attempt to absorb all that we find yet we can still be bothered when we
realize we too are becoming pigeonholed and simplified by those around
us.  The other self lives and it is we who give it life.  It is we who
believe that we exist and by believing that we exist,  believe that
others exist,  and by believing that others exist,  believe that other
versions of ourselves exist.  We say and do the things which determine
the shape that the other self will take though we cannot guess at its
environment or the influence that environment will wreak upon it.  How we
perceive how others perceive us greatly enhances our capacities to refine
our interactions with others and helps us create the inner-self we
believe we are or may become.  So though we fight it,  attempt to control
it,  and rebel against it,  we begrudgingly accept that it too is us.


Chapter 9  ---  Magic

			     The Magic in You

		 To give up on life
		   is the most tragic thing to do
		  and you could not if you knew
		    there is magic inside of you

		 Whatever you want can be yours,
		   all that it takes is you to make it so
		  What you want to learn you will know,
		    wherever you want to be you can go

		 The key to it all is confidence,
		   if you think failure then it will be
		  and you may keep failing until you see
		    that your belief can set you free

		 So do not give up on life
		   and in time your dreams will come true
		  if instead of feeling sad or blue
		    you remember there is magic in you

      Probably for as long as humanity has sought to reason it has had
a category of events which it calls magic.  Though we reason,  some
occurrences fall beyond the limits of logical rationality's ability to
explain them adequately so often we do not even attempt to do so.  We may
proclaim that they are manifestations of divine will or providence. 
Whatever our opinions may be of such seemingly unexplainable phenomena or
whether or not we believe in such things,  all of us are somewhat
familiar with a concept which we call magic.  Though there are thought to
be many different categories of magic,  including such moral terms as
good and bad (black and white magic),  I shall limit my remarks to what I
call purposeful action magic.
      Magic as I shall define it is simply wanting something to happen
and making certain events,  rituals,  gestures,  or other types of action
which are meant to make that intended occurrence or state of things a
reality.  Note that I did not specify that such things must occur in some
sort of way that goes beyond everyday experience,  as is the accepted
definition of magic.  If wanted a drink of water and I walked over to a
river and got myself a drink,  no one would consider that magical or
abnormal.  Yet if I got a drink from a dried up river or suddenly made a
glass of water appear without using sleight of hand,  few would doubt
that that could be called magic.
      My definition of magic does not distinguish between the natural
events which lead to the satisfaction or fulfillment of desire and the
so-called supernatural means by which others are achieved.  The term
magic is meant to apply to supernatural or beyond the realm of normally
explainable happenings.  Yet when someone wishes something to take place
or desires that a certain state of order be made to occur,  and that wish
does come to pass,  the same prescriptions for that wishes fulfillment 
match those of a magical happening.  A person conceives of what he or she
wishes will result and by doing something causes that end state of
existence to come to pass,  this is also what I call magic even though no
mysterious or unusual event occurred.  Simply stated,  magic is causing
ones wishes or goals to come true no matter how spectacularly or
mundanely they are accomplished.
      There are certain similarities involved in all sorts of magical
action both natural and supernatural.  The first is that the end result
is conceived and clearly defined.  Another is that certain steps will be
formulated which one believes if followed will result in the achievement
of that aim or goal.  This is where the similarity ends.  These steps are
always normally performable actions yet how they are thought to achieve
their ends may be very different.  If my goal were to become a doctor, 
some sort of schooling or study would probably be one of the steps I
would take to achieve that goal.  If my goal was to turn myself into a
bird and fly away,  I would probably also do some normal action which I
thought would help create that wish's fulfillment,  such as casting a
spell or doing a dance.  (Might I add,  I neither ridicule nor give
credence to such notions.)  In both cases the actions themselves are
ordinary yet how they are thought to contribute to the achievement of
their separate goals varies greatly.
      Some steps are thought to make their goals occur naturally.  If
one went to medical school,  studied hard and became a doctor,  it may be
difficult and commendable but not inconceivable.  However the second
example requires belief in something else beyond the scope of our normal
experiences for it to happen,  if it could happen at all.  Though the
actions may be understandable and easily defined,  the way in which they
come to cause such a condition may not be.  If one believed in a deity or
a supernatural being then one could turn to them to and ask them to do
the impossible or improbable.  Since these beings are decidedly superior
we cannot hold them responsible if such occurrences do not occur,  lest
we dare think we control them.  For any supernatural happening of a
willful sort to occur there would have to be a belief system which could
prescribe the actions by which the ends can be met and a rough idea of
how such a manipulation could or would occur.
      Often the means by which supernatural events can be achieved is
by the intervention of some perceived being who is thought to be capable
of accomplishing this feat.  The actions which would precipitate this
occurrence would likely consist of asking,  telling,  or begging that
spiritual being for assistance.  This may include some ritual intended to
please that being or  bribe it into assisting.  Often such things are
done within the bounds of religions which officially distance themselves
from these ancient patterns of behavior.  Prayer alone can be a plea for
help from another 'higher' being and good behavior and self-'sacrafice'
are often thought of as helpful to aiding one to having their prayers
answered.
      Most often what I call magic involves manipulations of concepts
which are thought to have an effect upon those existences which those
concepts represent.  There are many concepts which can be said to
represent an object or person.  A visual image is a powerful concept
which can apply to anything which can be seen.  Another powerful
representation of reality is words,  or more precisely,  names.  Naming
something is to give it a sound pattern which is thought to suggest and
signify something which exists.  One could go as far as to associate
object replicas of other objects or people and believe that these visual
images,  words,  or objects give them real control over the real objects
or persons which they signify.
      It is through these representations of reality that magic is
performed.  Visualization is a term which applies to forming a visual
concept of what you wish to aid yourself or to push yourself into
achieving it.  This is not normally perceived as abnormal or
supernatural.  Native Americans were fearful of photographs because they
thought this captured their souls and gave others power over them.  Words
are probably the most common representations we have of realities.  Much
ceremony goes into naming things and people,  and we realize that what
something is called can affect how people will perceive it.  Our ideas of
magic are greatly shaped by words and what we call spells.  Words and
names have long been thought to have power over people.  In some cultures
people kept secret names for themselves to keep others from being able to
manipulate them by using their names.  Even the name of God was once kept
secret as it was considered the most powerful and magical.  Object
representations of people,  things,  and events are also common. 
Idolatry is common in religions,  even those that proclaim to disdain it.
 All religions have religious symbols which are thought to possess some
magical power.  Those who practice voodoo believe that they can affect
the fate of others by making representations of them and manipulating
those objects.
      Whether anyone believes in such things or not,  magic is around
us everywhere.  Writing our hopes down (Joe + Sally),  fearing to speak
of bad fates,  and visualizing our goals,  these are just a few examples
of how we practice the fundamentals of symbolic manipulation without
realizing we are doing so.  We use visualization and conceptualization
every time we plan to do or say anything.  We think of it,  then we make
it so.  Our images are no longer confined to whom we may meet either. 
Thousands,  millions,  even billions of people may conceptualize who we
are and what we are and that image may indeed become far more important
than whatever the truth may be.  Names also continue to be synonymous
with who a person is and they continue to be considered important.  When
a person first thinks of himself or herself,  often the result is "I
am...",  followed by their individual name or other label.
      Perhaps no symbols we manipulate more than words as we constantly
rearrange them and use them to create our own conceptual worlds which we
inhabit more directly than we inhabit the so-called natural world.  How
we arrange and what we think about our symbolic representations of
reality affects what we believe we can do and achieve as greatly as our
concepts of ourselves does.  And it is they that control us even as we
attempt to use them to control our worlds.


Chapter 10  ---  Persuasion

			   A Battle of Ideas

		Two opposing ideas meet
		  on an empty desolate plane
		 and only one shall survive
		   for this dimension cannot contain
		  to differing definitions
		    of where its purpose lies

		With the weight of precedent
		  to be used to gather up force
		 they charge toward one another
		   eager to finally decide who rules
		  by virtue of surviving
		    the inevitable confrontation

		Out of the shattered debris
		  a victor emerges to gain claim
		 to this forgotten spectre of the universe
		   defined by the parameters of an argument
		  but it is to be forever vulnerable
		    as it must meet all challengers

      By no example is magic so clearly illustrated than by that
wondrous meeting of the minds called persuasion.  Two or more people meet
sharing multiple or disparate attitudes or beliefs and they come away
sharing a common belief.  Something has occurred to take disparate or
opposing ideas and make them one.  Sometimes it is found as a so-called
common ground or mutual concession by both parties but more often than
not one persons beliefs triumph over another's and the vanquished party
concedes the error of his ways.
      In my saying that this is a good example of magic I do not mean
that this event is brought about by symbolic manipulation which results
in something happening in the physical world.  It may not involve the
definition in that sense but it does clearly illustrate magic because it
is completely in the abstract.  Nothing is changed but ideas.  The whole
event of persuasion involves invented mental constructs which have no
basis in reality whatsoever except by virtue of being believed by a
person or persons.  One manipulates symbols (words) for the sole purpose
of convincing another that his or her position is the correct one.  If he
or she is successful all that is changed is an attitude in another,  a
formless concept having no bearing on anything other than what it might
encourage that someone who has now acquired it to do.
      There are many reasons why persuasion may work in any given
circumstance.  One of the reasons is persuasion by means of an eloquent
argument.  No argument,  I believe,  ever accounts for all variables nor
is it clear what its meaning may be in all circumstances.  We narrow the
focus of our arguments to those facts which tend to support our positions
and try to shift others attention to those areas upon which to form a
judgment.  We appeal to the reasoning process stating that upon a close
study of the facts any reasonable person would concur with our
conclusions.  All that is required for this tactic to work is that our
facts be verifiable or not easily disprovable and that our conclusions be
commonly deducible from the facts which we present.  That there might not
be a great deal of evidence to the contrary is always helpful.
      What is important here is narrowing the scope of inquisition to
that which we consider to be relevant.  If there is contrary evidence we
can always find some way to disqualify it from consideration. 
Challenging alternative viewpoints and then dissecting them to find the
flaws within any given perspective is often helpful in enabling one to
cause another to doubt their beliefs.  In any belief on anything there is
bound to be suppositions about something and a good debater will stress
these unprovable weak links and appear to destroy the validity of the
entire argument.  To be able to do this effectively while preventing
another from being able to do the same to your argument is a way to
achieve victory.  I realize that I have not yet mentioned that
fundamental concept called truth.  Whether or not truth is fundamental, 
an independently verifiable reality,  does NOT give it any relevance to
persuasion.  A preponderance of evidence of what we call a true viewpoint
in any given argument does affect the ability of one to persuade another,
 but whether the argument itself is true or not is insignificant.  Lies
are just as easy to believe as the truth,  if not easier.
      Another reason why persuasion works is what I call persuasion by
means of a forceful argument.  If one is convinced of the veracity of his
or her beliefs,  this conviction may overpower and inundate another.  In
this sense an exchange of viewpoints is like a game of chicken.  It all
becomes a matter of who quits first.  I am not saying whoever is the
first to break off the exchange is conceding defeat.  What I am saying is
that each person senses another's commitments to their courses of action
and beliefs,  and that when one encounters a person passionately
committed to viewpoints alternative to those which he or she has only a
mild allegiance to,  they tend to concur with the other because they
acknowledge that the other has probably more thoroughly thought the
matter out.  Part of the effectiveness of this depends on the amount of
faith one has in the others judgment.  This is a factor which can
dominate any fair appraisal of the speakers,  have little or no effect, 
or doom even the most eloquent and reasonable argument from even being
considered.
      This means of judging what is being said by who is saying it is
what I call persuasion by virtue of respect.  What we think about someone
who is trying to persuade us to believe something is almost as important
as the arguments he or she uses and the degree of conviction he or she
shows in these beliefs.  We can ignore a person right off if we do not
respect that person.  If we have no respect for them,  we are not likely
to consider anything which they say or believe as being worthy of our
considerations.  On the opposite end of that spectrum,  we are not likely
to question the words or wisdom of those whom we believe can do no wrong
(such as martyrs,  saviors,  and saints).  In between we may be persuaded
to certain views if we believe that another is more astute,  better
informed,  or otherwise possessing such abilities,  talents,  or
knowledge which we do not.  Psychologists call this "appeal to authority"
but I feel that the respect comes not from the position of authority but
from the superior abilities and capacities to make such judgments that
those in authority are assumed to have.
      So why do we feel that others probably often know better than we?
 It is conceivable to everyone that there are others with more
information than they on every possible subject with the possible
exception of their own lives.  Doubt certainly plays a part in why we so
often and so easily are made to believe ideas which others profess. 
Visible or clearly understandable applications of other ideas about
something are very persuasive evidence to show us not only that others
can and do have better or more knowledge than we,  but also that we are
at a disadvantage by not sharing these ideas.  It is this supposed
helplessness we have before those who have such 'superior' knowledge
which aids in our imprisonment by them.  By thinking that our own
viewpoints and opinions are insignificant,  we condemn ourselves to
thinking and being that which others provide for us.
      Persuasion is a way of persecution.  We may not be able to
persuade most people that our individual lives and contributions to
society are important but we can convince a few.  Persuasion in modern
society is mainly a one-way street with the majority of information and
cultural norms being fed into peoples minds with little or no feedback
coming out being considered as important.  Despite this we are each
well-versed in the art of persuasion.  We practice it daily when we
converse on most any subject.  We state a fact or opinion,  wait for
another person to agree or disagree,  and then conclude in agreement or
continue the exchange of opinions.  To attempt to persuade people of
anything is not necessarily to say that we are important,  but it is an
attempt to prove to ourselves that our opinions are important and that
they too are worthy of debate and consideration.  And once we persuade
someone that we are right,  we are vindicated.  We can at last say that
what we think and say matters because it mattered to someone else as
well.  We made a difference.
      All of persuasion is conjectural.  When we persuade people to
believe something we often do it by words.  We select those words which
we feel will have the most pronounced effectiveness.  When we succeed in
persuading someone else to change their views about something,  we have
changed an idea into something else.  If people's minds can be said to be
objects,  you have removed something and replaced it with something else.
 In this sense,  we constantly go about attempting to perform magic.  We
take an unsuspecting person and attempt to inflict our opinions upon him
or her.  If we do so,  our own importance is augmented.  That belief
which was once a part of us is now shared by more and more people,  a
concept growing only conceptually.
      When persuasion works best it is not done out of selfish reasons
to push our ideas onto others.  The most advantageous belief to have when
attempting to persuade another is that they really want to believe what
you have to say.  That they are imprisoned living in ignorance which can
be averted once you give them the chance to let it go,  this is how many
see attempting to persuade others.  They do it for their own good.  They
see a person who thinks differently as someone in need of help,  or that
they will not be truly happy unless they change their views and repent. 
I do not speak here of just religions,  but all levels,  aspects,  and
functions of society.  That one is just in forcing their views on others
for those peoples' benefits is a common and erroneous outgrowth of the
belief that others,  particularly the group as a whole,  always know best.
      To think that you know the truth and you are merely attempting to
enlighten another is another similar method of interpreting your
discourse's value.  When one believes in things which are not true,  once
told of this in a way that he or she could understand,  then that person
would completely agree that such attention was beneficial and was
absolutely the right thing to do.  These models not only prescribe how
one should react once he or she is persuaded of the error of his or her
ideas or ideals,  they also reinforce their own validity by stressing
their own values.  Each model goes beyond merely attempting to get others
to conform to their own beliefs,  they judge all and categorize all by
what they believe on that issue.
      These categorizations and this tendency to view others in
accordance to ones own terms has real repercussions on how one can
perceive oneself.  The persuasion by an individual attempting to make his
mark upon the group can be considered healthy,  whereas the attempt by
the group (society as a whole) to try to persuade all individuals to
conform threatens the very concept of individuality.  It is the
categorization of how people perceive the nature of their relationships
with others combined with how they understand themselves which enables
them to act upon those courses of action which appear to reduce both the
significance and the validity of contrary viewpoints.  When this is done
by an individual to an individual,  it is a fair fight.  But like most
fights humanity has fought,  this is one group versus another which grows
until all people are eventually forced to submit to the dominant groups
influence as opposing viewpoints become ever more scarce.


Chapter 11  ---  The Variance Factor

			       For No One

		 This is for no one
		   who never was nor will ever be
		  Robbed of any future,
		    it could have been us oh so easily

		 He will never hope or dream,
		   he will never laugh or cry
		  Never to live,  never to die
		    and never to understand why

		 He will never know of love
		   or what it means to be happy
		  He will never know of kindness
		    or the true value of sincerity

		 Fated to be what is not
		   above and beyond eternity
		  always and never absent
		    from what we call reality

		 Millions of new opportunities
		   come and go within our days,
		  few realized,  most fade away
		    but within the realm of possibility
		   far greater than what can be
		     exists all past potentialities
		    which we never have nor ever will see

		 Maybe it is there that he exists
		   as an idea long since forgotten
		  living a life that never was,
		    giving what will never be gotten
		   by us in our separate world
		     of limited possibilities,
		    side by side yet forever apart
		      locked in separate realities

      If I feel that the greatest mistake humanity ever makes is to
consider themselves their bodies,  then I must consider our beliefs that
our consciousness' exist in a definitive shape molded by our experiences
to run a close second.  Yes,  I do feel that our memories make us what we
are yet we are what creates the circumstances which will come to pass as
those things which we remember.  This need which exists for a
multi-junctured reality defined or created by personal choice makes a
universe far more complicated than most minds have as yet fathomed.  This
limited reality,  what has occurred as differentiated from what has not, 
is but a miniscule slice of the dynamic whole.
      When we make a choice of action we take ourselves and our whole
physical plane from one logical end to another.  The means for regulating
this transformation of direction (energy) is our consciousness'.  Think
of it as a train racing along a track.  Each decision creates a junction
of tracks and the choice represents the new destination.  The sum of all
these trains,  the pattern of their movements,  and the design it creates
is our physical universe.  Each decision we make affects the whole of the
universe by changing a portion of the overall pattern.  Patterns are
created by movements of near trains moving in conjunction or opposition
to one another.  When one train changes direction one sub-pattern is
changed and another is formed.  This all allegorical so please try not to
take this too literally.  Another way to think of it is to picture four
objects hanging in empty space.  If one object moves away from the others
it could also be said that the others are moving away from it.  The
direction of one object affects the perspective by which all others
around it are judged.
      Our consciousness' are connected to all other consciousness' in a
sense,  but in a much greater sense our consciousness' are connected to
ourselves.  When each junction is met by the train,  divergences occur. 
The train neither takes one track or the other but instead takes both. 
In the sense that the train is our conscious selves,  we are riding both
routes at once.  Obviously this branching out of our consciousness'
cannot diminish us for if it did we would by now have been acutely
dissipated as we have faced millions of junctures within our lives.  When
we choose anything we are merely choosing what memories we will record or
what avenue of events will be played out.  Thus within the framework of
our own consciousness',  there are what would seem to us to be an almost
infinite number of diverse 'lives'.  Unfortunately or fortunately not
every choice we make sets our lives and the universe on separate tracks
or creates meaningful junctures. Whether we have a sandwich or soup for
lunch is a choice which causes an almost insignificant ripple in the
scheme of things.
      Being locked into our own consciousness' gives us an enormous
amount of room to explore our universe.  It is possible to break down the
barriers between different event-dimensional worlds and fuse with our own
minds in different parallel worlds.  Thus to our memory-based minds,  we
can ride both trains or communicate between trains.  It is in this
fashion that a consciousness can seem to be in two different physical
places at the same time.  One reality can communicate memories or
experiences to another.
      Since I have stated that all consciousness' are separated
versions of the same consciousness,  it is possible to fuse with any
other consciousness at any point in time in any possible reality.  This
however lies far beyond the much more simple ability to reconcile with
different event-spacial versions of oneself.  Being the same
consciousness,  this is more easily attained.  The ability to reconcile
with these juxtaposed memory tracks depends on the likeness of those
realities.  Where major events and main memories are identical, 
cross-communication can be obtained with relatively little effort.  This
is not enhancing or enlarging a consciousness by any definition for if it
is not subtracted from by crossroads,  it cannot be said to be added to
by cross-communication.  All that can be said to be achieved is an
exchange of information.
      It is not advantageous nor particularly pleasant to over exploit
this capacity as the ability to separate what has happened in our
particular realities from what might have happened in others constitutes
a major basis of the reasoning process.  This present single history
memory is our present means of understanding everything.  The thought
that this single history basis of understanding might become lost by
evolution has occurred to me.
      Other than the likeness of similar happenings,  information can
often be obtained at grand junctions.  If we think of every major
decision we make as leading us in different directions,  there are
occasional events in our lives which occur beyond our conscious control
and therefore cut across many different realities.  Events such as
funerals or other major happenings force us to be at a  certain place and
time no matter what courses our 'lives' have otherwise taken.  It is at
these times when a single event presently occurring is being entered into
a number of disparate possible same consciousness lives at a common
reference point and time that an instinctive joining takes place.  I do
not mean to confuse what I am saying with redefining life in the face of
death.  The funeral example could have been any event which cuts across
many possible realities and draws many of oneselves together for a common
purpose or to inhabit a similar place and time under similar circumstances.
      This is commonly achieved quasi-consciously and draws together
what would otherwise be highly incomprehensible numbers of possible
realities to become grouped into a sort of metaphorical highways of
personal events.  Different selves come and go off at different points
but there are points where they converge thus lessening potentially
infinite numbers to lower yet still just as astonishingly high numbers.
      The variance factor is how much each of these realities varies
from the others.  Where the variance is high,  individuals can seem lost
jumping from one track to another without feeling any common bonding with
disparate versions of themselves.  Others who live lives with little room
for perceived personal preferences tend to stay on major tracks most of
their lives.  This common sharing of the same life-tracks by extreme
numbers of oneselves may lead to a greater feeling of security that they
know that they are living their lives the 'correct' way.  These lifetimes
of little variance may also lead to a heightened degree of forbearance.
      If nothing else,  this chapter should give people a thing or two
to think about.  We take for granted that a single history description
applies to our physical universe even though we have barely begun to
explore it.  Explorations in ways science cannot readily confirm await
those adventurous enough to tear apart their assumptions about what is
and what is meant to be,  to look anew at what we think we understand. 
The clue to the direction humanity shall take if it proceeds at all may
be found in how very small children are able to think and understand with
a much greater fluidity than adults.  Perhaps what we should not teach
them,  that we ourselves understand the world,  is as important as what
we should.


Chapter 12  ---  The Ultimate Frontier

			     In Full Bloom

	      The boundaries between life and dreams
		have long fallen before humanity's eyes
	       and their world has grown far beyond
		 anything which we can conceptualize

	      Limitless variations of time and space
		are all within reach of our posterity's minds
	       and our entire history up to this date
		 is but a tiny segment of what they can find

	      Their consciousness' are free to roam
		among that realm which we call eternity
	       growing immeasurably with each breath
		 their almost insignificant bodies breathe

	      Countless planets and civilizations
		have lives and views their minds have sought
	       yet there is no need for recording them
		 for they are there with merely a thought

	      They can comprehend all the universe
		yet they realize the limits of their view
	       because as wide as their horizons may seem
		 their experience is only what they choose to do

      The final point in the evolution of a consciousness is reached
when that consciousness is able to cross at will any conceptual barrier
between itself and any or all other consciousness'.  Many believe that
this is the result of dying,  that the spirit joins with all else and a
total realization of itself and the universe occurs.  Of this I am
skeptical yet I do not wish my skepticism from keeping myself or anyone
else from accepting this 'easy' way out of existence.  The reason behind
my skepticism is single consciousness to consciousness exchanges after
death commonly referred to as reincarnation.  If a total understanding
were achieved with all equally,  such happenings would not occur.
      All consciousness' are equal.  All arise out of potentiality
without physical pasts or continuations into indefinite physical futures.
 If we (all conscious beings) are all equal consciousness'  no bigger, 
larger,  or more powerful than any others and we are all parts of the
same consciousness,  one consciousness at different times and spaces
believing it is different beings,  then we are not reincarnations of any
other being but instead everyone else in every other time is a different
incarnation of ourselves.  However,  just as there is a need in people to
join in common consciousness' with others in their own time,  there is
also a need for some to join in common consciousness' with others across
time.  A common consciousness in its most extreme form was defined in
RELATIVISM 2 as existing when two or more separate entities believe that
they are in fact splits of the same consciousness thus redefining their
notions of themselves.
      Reincarnation as we call it comes to us as a result of trying to
add a time definition to ourselves.  From the present looking past point
of view,  one searches for a frame of reference to give one definition
which one is lacking in its present form.  From the present looking
forward point of view,  it is the chance to taste immortality,  to give
one another life in which to realize its goals.  Notions of reincarnation
both enhance and diminish (conceptually speaking of course) a
consciousness.  Knowledge is increased and a greater affinity with
another conscious being occurs yet there can be a lessening of the
present self's chances for attaining its own goals as time and
opportunities are finite in the course of a single lifetime.  Likeness of
intent and purpose may indeed be a prerequisite for any common
consciousness to occur yet individual goals always exist and can be
threatened by such bondings.
      There is the crux of the matter.  How much should a consciousness
keep itself distant from other consciousness'?  If the end which we are
all striving for is a union with other consciousness',  is not any
enlargement of our own consciousness with others a good thing?  Even if
it were a given that we are all striving for the total realization of the
self (all else),  just because an enlargement of the self occurs does not
necessarily mean it is the most progressive step we may take towards this
end.  That which we use to define ourselves,  the notion of the 'self', 
is by its definition mutually exclusive.  By viewing ourselves as finite
tangible beings different than all else by our reference points in time
and space and our differing notions of purpose,  we are excluding
ourselves from all else to distinguish what we are.  To expand this to
one or two past consciousness' reinforces the walls between the present
self and all others of that specific past time in which the other partner
dwells.  Still,  one could reasonably argue that a clear connection to a
specific consciousness is better than a hazy connection to a multitude of
consciousness'.  Yet the clarity of that single connection is dependent
upon and proportional to the severing of other connections.
      Reincarnation as we view it is from the context of someone in the
present joining with the past,  or from someone from the present joining
with the future.  The present to the past is the major thrust of
reincarnation philosophy and it is the most easily understood.  Present
to future is confusing because our own self is changing up until our
deaths and we exist in no single reality but a multiple of realities. 
Likewise,  we can 'throw' ourselves into no definite reality but instead
into the lump sum of all possible realities.  Present to the past is
clearer because the definition of the present precludes a definitive
past.  Though all possible pasts may be technically possible to achieve
conjunctions with,  that time line which created ourselves is already
very much a part of our present beings.  Thus,  looking into that
definitive past which culminated in the creation of ourselves,  the
haziness of potentiality is narrowed to a definite number of possible
former selves living out what is from our point of view totally
deterministic lives.
      Therein lies the answer to how our lives can be deterministic or
not depending upon how we view ourselves.  If we concentrate on our
perception on the present leaving the future undefined,  we exist in a
multitude of possible  realities.  If we instead transfer our perception
to a single possible reality then the events between the present and that
possible reality become predetermined.  This is an integral part of how
we function as any goals we may hope to achieve exist to us as possible
realities.  We strive to build bridges between those possible realities
in which we have achieved our goals and those ones which we presently
inhabit where they exist only as possible potential goals.  So if we
define existence as having goals as I have,  predeterminism is inevitable
though the rate at which it is enforced is fluid.  All of ones life can
be put into a deterministic outlook by contacting a possible future self
through a type of common consciousness bonding.  All events in ones life
which went into creating that world in which the other self dwells would
be predetermined.  Indeed,  half of the new self created would see the
other half's events as solid,  not open to change.  Therefore attempting
to prefix upon a certain reality in the future can rob one of determining
the course of the present.
      The key to understanding all of this is that the present exists
as a concept.  You either believe it exists or you don't.  If you believe
in it you stand with a definite past and no definitive future,  literally
anything is possible.  We,  humanity,  believe in it in shades.  We
believe that the past runs in contiguous lines into the future,  that the
roads we travel behind us continue ahead in some logical fashion reaching
some logical end,  and by this belief we create it or add some
predeterminism to it.  Existing in the present gives one power over the
future.  Just as we latch onto possible selves in possible realities and
thus see and know events before they happen because we preclude them to
be,  we can choose which possible reality to make real.  This often is
not done consciously yet always it is done.  We search through possible
realities until we find the one which we feel is the best,  for ourselves
if we are selfish or for all others if we are not,  and we begin to
believe that it has already occurred thus predetermining the events which
will lead to that reality.






				  Appendix


Postscript

			      Mortal Rectitude

		Pushing ever towards the end
		  we reach out for the newest and latest
		 and we receive them yet again
		   never doubting 
		  the relevancy or immediacy
		    of evolution

		Seeing ourselves decay
		  and knowing our governments and systems,
		 our attempts to keep change at bay,
		   condemn us 
		  to see that our lives and ritual actions
		    are institutions

		Doomed to eventual obscurity
		  we struggle to achieve eternal importance
		 lest we become forgotten history
		   always believing 
		  that to be remembered is to live,
		    an absolution

		Pegged into the fold,
		  locked into a slice of eternal time
		 chained to life fading and old
		   ever acknowledging
		  neither acceptance nor denial
		    is resolution

      Acceptance and denial.  We hear about these most often as they
pertain to death but perhaps their most definitive and telling reference
lies in how they describe our attitudes about life itself.  Do we accept
our worlds,  ourselves,  and the inherent justice or injustice of nature
or God itself?  Is life the striving to accept the absurdities inherent
within or is life instead the denial of death.  These are the questions
from which we shall either command from our chosen points of view, 
ponder over endlessly,  or lie forever ignorant of ourselves for lack of
their consideration.
      Religions hit us on both fronts.  Accept God's will yet at the
same time rebel against our real nature.  We can talk about a higher
nature endlessly but the subjective biological facts of nature (violent, 
tragic deaths of species,  peoples,  civilizations,  etc.) surpass the
brutality of Man at its utmost degree.  Kill or be killed,  consume life
or die as well,  against this backdrop we struggle to create and justify
morality perhaps not so much as though it must exist but because we could
not tolerate life without it.
      The most important fact in dealing with our world with or without
morality is to believe in it and therefore accept tentatively its
existence.  Yet life is to me and seemingly should be more than merely
existing in and dealing with reality,  it must strive to alter reality, 
to make it different than it was before,  different than it would have
been had not whomever's individual life had come to be.  This is living
and if we do not believe that we possess this power to alter reality then
we do not believe that we are truly alive.
      All religions as well as all philosophies necessarily praise the
value of accepting oneself and ones circumstances as a prerequisite step
towards accommodating change.  Yet religions deny life as well.  This is
not the true world,  the best world,  we are not our true,  higher, 
enlightened selves all of which waits forever around the next corner in
some timeless eternal we can fantasize about far more readily than we can
conceive.
      The notion that our common future is bound to be good has its bad
points as well.  Overlooking momentarily its overwhelmingly generous
dispensation of hope to enable everyone or even a single person to gain
strength enough to survive or excel,  it suggests predeterminism in that
no matter what or how much can go wrong the universe,  humanity,  God or
country,  all will survive or mature in the end.  Yet perhaps the
greatest challenge we face during life comes not from any imperceptibly
difficult or seemingly insurmountable task or troubles,  nor from a lack
of faith in the value of values.  The hardest obstacle to overcome is the
idea that no matter what we do,  right or wrong,  nothing will change and
all will go on almost as if we had never existed at all.
      From almost any grandiose point of view this is correct. 
Everything is born,  lives,  and dies.  The best we can hope for is to
make the living less painful,  nobler and more fulfilling perhaps,  and
the death as prudently postponed as possible.  What is old age for a
civilization?  How long is too long for a single species to dominate or
by its continued existence,  to prevent new ones from arising?  Imagine
if everyone lived on Earth forever,  no births,  no deaths,  no life as
we know it to be.  And if it seems likely that death is inevitable and
even necessary,  does this make life cheaper or more valuable?  The more
there is of something,  even people,  seemingly the less it is valued. 
Though we all,  nearly all,  will rise fiercely to defend the sanctity of
life,  killing goes on continually,  methodically,  and senselessly
generally without more opposition than general misgivings.
      If we could stop senseless killing,  if we could end starvation, 
famine,  disease;  what then would we have done?  Make it possible for
more people to suffer other more painful inflictions we heap upon each
other without any relationship to the necessity for resources.  If making
life longer for people cannot be judged by itself an indisputable
achievement,  how is it possible anyone might ever agree on what might
constitute making life better:  the removal of obstacles to overcome, 
the promise of potential for anyone to succeed?  Once success is assured
it is no longer valued and without wrongs to be righted,  could simply
maintaining the status quo ever be considered an achievement?  This is
all basic and most admit there are no easy answers but what we all fear
is that there are no answers at all.
      So we put aside our feelings of ineffectualness and pick
something to attempt to achieve convincing ourselves of its (and our own)
importance.  To do any less would be to deny life,  which we can do and
still live yet it would seem to severely diminish its desirability.  We
live because...  and we must provide for ourselves the answer.
      Humanity will die as we all must die.  Death is not necessarily a
bad thing yet while we live we are responsible for continuing and
nurturing life.  Prolonging and improving the quality of others lives as
well as our own is all anyone can ever reasonably hope to achieve.  That
goal can be met.  If its effects are not long lasting,  no matter.  If we
can keep pain or death at bay for anyone even for a moment that moment, 
if nothing else in this universe,  that moment belongs to us.
